Quarter Life Musings

At last, we’re done! At least I could focus more on other things. I have to say even I was impressed with what we did. The robes, witch hats, the background music, the darkened room… ang arte talaga namin hehehe. Only we could pull off something like that. Sa song and dance number pa lang namin talbog na sila eh. If only all the other groups presented the same day, panalo talaga kami. Pa-comedy pa nga ako last night eh. I forgot to put on my hat, I was laughing with John… but basically I had a great time. It was surprising that I didn’t feel nervous while I was there up front. Seems like this is for me

Last night was CSI Las Vegas’ season finale… SOBRANG GALING!!! Astig talaga si Quentin Tarantino. At tawang tawa ako sa scene ni David and the coroner (what’s his name?). Very reminiscent of Pulp Fiction. And the dad was saying Nick will look good at his funeral. Astig talaga. I even watched it when I got home today, hindi ko pa rin makalimutan

Got home from AAV half an hour ago. It was good that they changed my schedule. At least I can go back to the gym by next week! I had new students today, Kiby and Sofia - with whom I’m such having a hard time, she doesn’t know what a "mother" is!

Only got 5 hours of sleep I have to make up for lost sleep tonight!

Yes I’m stressed. Since last week. No wonder my period came a day early. I’ve been lacking sleep and Ann’s starting to get on my nerves. She can’t seem to understand anything on her book! Nagpapacute lang ng nagpapacute. Sigh. And this demo teaching thing is slowly taking its toll. We better get a 4.0 on this or else!

Anyway, it had been a nice weekend. Got together with Kristine, Novalyn and Keissen, people I haven’t seen for ages! Saw Novalyn at Cable Car Alabang around the time when I resigned from Ingenico. With Kristine and Keissen it has been at least 8 years? But it still felt like old times and it was all good

I stayed up til past 1 this morning typing our script for Thursday. Syempre hindi pa rin yun tapos. Good thing I was able to write a story awhile ago. Now we need to do everything else by tomorrow for our demo teaching on Thursday. I swear I’m getting drained. And I have to come up with a synthesis paper in 2 weeks time. I got started on my scrapbook already, but it doesn’t look like one yet. Then there’s the portofolio, the empirical paper, and of course the finals. And I’m loading up on carbs again

The good thing is, I think I’m perfectly fine, perfectly over. I don’t even have the urge to communicate. No, nada. And I think I’m very well on my way to recovery. I do think about it yes, but I don’t miss it/him/whatever. Yahoo! And I know good things will start coming up again

The ice cube I was holding just melted. I ws rubbing it on the side of my head because I bumped my head on the doorknob and I thought I saw stars….

Yesterday was the first day of being an ESL teacher. We were driven to this house in Alabang where we met the kids. I was assigned to Jessie and Ann, 13 and 12 years old, respectively. Jessie looked so much like my cousin Ai-Ai when she was the same age. We had so much trouble understanding each other. Ann was pretty though boyish and she badly wanted me to understand her. She was also funny, and I even told him if we get to finish her workbook early I would let her teach me Korean. She was really funny, she’d open up her dictionary and point to me random words, and she made me trace the Korean characters printed haha! "Ah, uh.. korean, easy, english… hard!" I love her! I’ll upload her pic some other time.

Too bad it got my schedule messed up in school so I probably won’t teach every Thursdays. I hope they retain my 1-5pm sked (except Thursdays) and I’ll still get a morning schedule… para maraming pera! Woohoo!

I just finished reading the book and it left me with a very heavy feeling. Doesn’t help if I haven’t been in a very good mood when I started it. Cathi was right in saying that JKR didn’t do justice to Dumbledore, having him killed just like that. Started reading the PEx forums na rin.. and I can’t wait for the last book! Good thing midterms is over, now I can go back to doing the stuff I need for this week.

I was able to talk to my best friend Cathi yesterday for 2 1/2 hours. Good thing she called, I badly needed reinforcement yesterday. I was staring blankly during mass, I was reading the same page on Order of the Phoenix over and over, I was locked up in my room, lying down. But at the end of the day I finally decided that it’s really a no-brainer when you think about it. It doesn’t take a genius to realize what I should do about this. I should just get on with my life because it looks like he’s getting on with his life perfectly fine so why shouldn’t I?

It really helps when you talk to friends who are very much willing to talk some sense into you. At least during those bouts of weakness you are not bound to do anything stupid. Basta it’s clearer to me now, I will just have to let go and get on with my life.

"…Find out what it means to me…I got to have (just a little bit)… A little respect (just a little bit)…" so goes Aretha Franklin. And just about everyone deserves it. I have always believed that people are generally good. So you’d imagine my surprise that some people that I actually trusted before would do something as worthy as a slap in the face and a kick in the balls. No one has ever treated me as foul so that might just earn him more pogi points in hell.

Enough of bashing people not worthy of my time and attention. I might just forgive after some time, but I will never talk to him again. Anyway, yesterday my trainer made me start on circuit training. I’m hoping this will be more effective than my previous program. But I’m still hooked on chocolate how’s that? :S

He really has His ways of pulling me back in the right direction. Makulit din akong bata yet He has stayed with me all throughout, never faltering. At ngayong gising na gising na ko sa katotohanan, I resign! Hahaha. I resign from this pathetic excuse of a life. Morrie Schwartz was right. Immerse youself in your emotions, let them penetrate you fully, until you can rightfully say, "I need to move on and experience other emotions". Damn right, there are other worthy emotions I’m entitled to!

This may sound like a familiar clamor from the masses to the government, but just the same, it is the very same thing that my heart yearns for. Eeww did I actually say that? To hell with whoever reads my blog! Hehehe

Tama na, tigilan na. Kasi nahihirapan ako magiisip ng kung anu-ano. Wala namang reason to hold on. At nararamdaman ko in the long run ako ang mahihirapan, at baka hindi ako tigilan talakan ng nanay ko. Mahirap yun, lalo na for someone unemployed like I am.

Palitan na! Tama na ang airtime nun, I need to move on. Kaya to anyone who’s kind enough to help me out here, by all means you’re welcome LOL!

At narealize ko lang lahat to while on the treadmill a few hours ago, looking out the window…